So, labels in relationships was something I was discussing with my friends over Chinese recently. We came to the conclusion that in recent years, we are more likely to go out with someone but not make it official as boyfriend and girlfriend or simply just not Facebook official. We agreed this was all perfectly fine but it got me thinking have we gone too far with some labels in relationships and is it getting harder to define if you are just seeing or actually dating someone?
Personally, I like being someone’s girlfriend. A few of my friends have engaged in casual relationships or what you would call friends with benefits and most of them have just got too attached when the guy has made it clear he wants nothing more. It’s really sad that it has to be this way and I don’t think I could do it myself but I admire those that feel they can. We label this as friends with benefits but friends aren’t that intimate with each other so what should the label be? It’s not a typical relationship but I see so many people just settling for this rather than having long term relationships. Think about what it is doing to your self esteem.
Then there is the Facebook label. My relationship is Facebook official. I don’t see a problem with it but I also don’t see a problem with people who don’t want to post it up there. It doesn’t make them any less in love with each other! Some people put their relationship up there and it makes it look like everything is going well when in fact, it isn’t, so have a think next time you go to post something relationship-y on Facebook. Are you doing it for attention? Because it’s obvious to the rest of us…
What about the people who are seeing each other but aren’t officially boyfriend and girlfriend? Just a bit more official than friends with benefits, these are the people who haven’t been going out long but are testing the waters. They want to be sure of each other before they commit to a relationship which is quite sensible if you ask me. Most of my relationships have been like this and it’s the best way to get to know each other but I like it to go somewhere. If you are merely messing with me just to have a girlfriend then get out.
The one night stand or just the booty call. Never done it never plan to. I can’t think of anything more demoralising than this label. I’d get too attached for sure but it’s also what I call a shallow person relationship. The types of people who want that one thing for the pleasure and not the company.
Then there is the actual relationship side of things. The people who go on dates and hold hands. The people who know each others family and friends and tolerate them. The person you go to about to everything from the argument you had with your mum to your day at work. They understand and accept you. This to me is what a relationship should be. Whether that is a same sex relationship or not, this level of respect is what I would expect and cherish from a relationship.
Don’t expect anything less. Know your worth 🙂